Evil Laziness!

Hello Everyone!!

I know I haven't posted lately, and yes I have said this before but life is super busy. I am at that point in the semester where all these assignments are popping up, the beginning of tests and of course a lot of reading. It's crazy and I hate that it's all due at once but that's life. It doesn't help that I have an extreme case of senioritius, and no not the old people kind. I am in the very last semester of my undergraduate degree and have zero motivation to get things done. I love sitting in some of my classes, learning different things, but I just want to sit there and learn, I don't want to do any of the assignments, It's sad I know. I want to get good grades but I just want them handed to me and don't want to work for them and that's just not right. So pray for me if you pray or send me good thoughts because I need all the help I can get. Making myself do anything right now is hard.

That may partially be due to the cold I am fighting against. I sadly fell victim to that evil cold that has swept across the state or at least the area i live in. I hate being sick and it really railroaded my work out plans. If I am honest I don't mind, again I want to get in shape and thinner but I don't want to put forth the effort. I seriously suffer from laziness disease and it sucks. I want to be more motivated but I am just not. It's a horrible feeling especially when I am not happy with the way things are. I am tired of being that person that sits around all the time, but i don't do anything to change it. Ladies and Gents this is laziness at it's prime and it's horrible. Yes being sick doesn't help but still. I can lay the blame on everything I want but I know the truth, I am the problem.

To solve this problem, I am going to try something new. I am going to make an exercise calendar to help keep me motivated. I even downloaded an app for my phone to aid me in my progress. I am going to fill this calendar with good and motivating sayings and keep my eyes on the prize. My prize is being in good shape and content with how I look and feel. This is for me, not anyone else, but me. Now on the school front, that is just gonna take me sitting down and biting the bullet. So tomorrow I am going to sit down and make myself do my homework and do it well. There is no point in doing the assignments if I am not going to do them well, at least in my train of thought. So I just have to kick my butt into gear, I am almost done and I want to finish really well and the only way to do that is to give it my all. That also applies to both fronts. If you don't push yourself you won't grow, and I want to grow.

These are some of the challenges in my life. These are the minor trials of my life, and they may seem trivial to some but they are important to me. I have spent a lot of time focusing on my big time dreams but that's not wise. I need to focus on the here and now and go on from there. Dreams are good, hang on to them but don't botch things in the present. That is my plan anyways.

Now my deep question for you: What are things that you want to change? I mean things like my example, like my laziness. Is there something about you that you know needs to change but you haven't yet? Guess what you can change it! We both can and will! I have faith in you and so does God! Together we can make it through these two times and see the change come. I am not going to set a date because that's not fair, but I know someday in the future, I won't be lazy. I will be active and won't procrastinate things. I need to grow up, I can't be a kid forever.  So think about it the next couple of days and devise ways to make those changes. We are making ourselves better people, never know when someone may need us at our very best. So get out there and get motivated. God will help you through it, all you have to do is ask him.

Good Luck and Blessings!

Simple Moments, Lasting Memories

Greetings and Salutations!!

One of my friends came to me today and told me I needed to post more. I couldn't help but laugh because it made me happy to know that people were reading this. So this particular post is dedicated to you, dear friend, who wants to read more of my crazy thoughts on things. You know who you are ;)

I am in a pretty good mood today, and I found a gif to kind of show how i feel and yes it's another Supernatural gif, but it captures me perfectly!

Yes I am doing a happy dance today for a number of reasons. One of them being I had a great time with my family today. It was just a good time of fellowship and laughs and it was very much needed. The other reason is because I took a picture today and sent it to one of my favorite authors. It was something so simple but I found it funny and sent it to her and she retweeted it. -insert fangirly squeal here- (It probably looks something like this, but with jumping and squealing)

After she retweeted it, it went viral!!! Something me, little Nicol, who lives in some obscure and unknown place posted went completely viral in the fandom. Yes it's something silly to be excited over but I was excited that it went that far. Now fans are plotting crimes to steal the sign in the picture but it was just amazing to me that something I took brought that all together. That got me thinking, well that and other things in my life.

It sounds silly but all I really want right now is to feel important to someone, to matter I guess would be a way to explain it. I know I matter to friends and my family but I just want to feel important. Like when a friends sends you a text with an inside joke or someone famous retweets your tweet. I want to feel that way and I haven't felt that way in a long time. My personality is to do that for other people, by picking out something I know you like, even if it's small, or sending a text or picture of something I know you will find amusing. I go out of my way to let people know I am thinking about them, and that they are important enough that I remembered them when I saw something. I want that too. So when it happened on Twitter with one of my favorite authors, it just made my entire week. It's simple and seems silly to some but to me it meant quite a lot.

Today is a day I will always remember, do you have moments like that? Those are moments to treasure and think back on, especially when you are feeling low. God totally gives us moments like these to look back on when we are feeling down, I believe that wholeheartedly. Now for some it may not be what I experienced but we are all unique people, with different likes. Today God totally blessed me and put the biggest smile on my face, today he found an awesome way to make me feel special and important. That is how awesome God is, he knows just how to make your day or your week in my case. So if you are feeling blue, think back on a good memory, something that just totally made your day. If that doesn't work, come find me, I am sure I can put a smile on your face.

SORRY! I totally had to put that up there because as I was writing that line that scene totally came to mind. Yes I am a die hard batman fan, I just can't help it. But if you liked the movie, I am sure you probably just smiled.

To summarize, God is good, my life is awesome and though I may feel low tomorrow, I have good memories to look back on. I am one blessed girl and I am just happy I can share it with you my lovely readers!!

Checking In & a Quick Thought

Dearest readers!!!

Enjoy this Supernatural gif that I snagged from tumblr. I do like this show and this gif pretty much sums up how I feel. I am giving each of you my readers a hug, I've missed you all so much.

I know it feels like a dog's age since I have posted but life has been rather busy. I had no idea that taking 5 classes would be so busy. I've done it before but having them all shoved into one day makes it a bit much to deal with. It's really messed with my gym schedule, which makes me sad, because I love to work out and miss the gym. I just get so tired and worn out, getting myself to go is hard. I do manage some smaller workouts but still. Not too mention I feel like I have worked a lot this past week. New People to train and things to do but such is life.

I've been going through some things lately. I am sure I will post about them soon but I am just waiting on the proper inspiration. believe it or not my posts are inspired which is probably why they are so wordy. Regardless when the inspiration strikes I promise you will have an epic post. For right now I am just trying to wade through life and the trials I am enduring. I have to keep my eye on the prize though because it gets hard to continue to walk through the fire. It's hard and it would be so easy to give up, but I want to be that refined and pure gold, so I continue on, with the strength of God keeping me going.

I do miss you all and I am glad that you have stuck with me. I am almost to 200 views which is rather exciting. I will admit I have shared this blog with people and they shared it with friends, which makes me want to squeal like a girl. I am honored that you have taken the time to read my thoughts on things, and am sorry that this post isn't exciting, I've just got a lot going on. So thank you for reading new readers, and please continue to check back in. I do have more to say, I guarantee you that.

Be Blessed!!

In need of a change of heart

I survived my first week of classes. Woooo!!! 5 classes in one day, with no breaks is a task but I like just getting them all done. I run on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9:15 to 4:30 but I don't mind it. Two of my classes I love, because the professor rocks. She's passionate about her subject, which is Greece and Ancient Greeks and she knows her stuff. If I ever become a professor, I want to be like her. Everyone loves her and you can tell that she gets through to students. All in all my semester will be intense but I can do it, because God is with me.

Now to the point of this post. I am not going to lie, my attitude sucks at my job. Little things grate on me and it only developed over time. Like the way customers will talk to me, like I am stupid or beneath them, when they try to break $100 bills for $5 worth of stuff then get all over me because I can't do it. There are other little things but I am just naming a few. Needless to say that working at a gas station has been a real test of my patience, once that I have been failing epically. My temper for some reason is easily tripped and I get all defensive and angry. I even get that way with certain co-workers. Now don't get me wrong I do enjoy working with many of the people I am working with but some just get under my skin. I am not kind about it either, i am purposefully short and sometimes rude. My personality is non-confrontational, so I only go so far, because I don't want to start a fight or hurt anyone. I just get so frustrated, I have a hard time keeping my temper and attitude in check.

Now one of my co-workers, bless her heart, is a God-loving woman like myself but she's what I hope to be. She doesn't let anything bother her. She's got so much love and grace in her heart that people could be flat out rude and she just smiles it off and doesn't let it get to her. She has a true appreciation for people and knows how God and Jesus would act around these people. She challenged me one day, telling me things I already knew but need to know and I got mad. I thought she didn't understand me, how I thought. If she was at the job as long as I have, maybe she'd understand. My mom kind of has a temper and such, and I would blame it on that, genetics of all things. Deep down though, I knew she was right. And I think what bothered me most was tht I let myself get to this point, to the point where I am not patient with anyone and only kind to a few. Instead of being kind to those who are mean to me, because maybe that's all they need.

I need a change of heart. I need to adjust my thinking, and open myself up to God so he can change me. Being rude and angry toward those that irk me isn't the way. Like I said in my positive reinforcement post, maybe they need a kind word, maybe they had a bad day. I don't know and it's not necessarily my place to know. All I need to do is worry about my heart and my attitude. I need to focus on doing what I know to be right and not let myself get bogged down by other people's opinions and how everyone else responds. I know it won't happen over night but I want it to change. I don't want this dark and ugly cloud over my head all the time. I want to enjoy every aspect of life and all it has to offer. Besides it takes more muscles to frown than to smile and I don't want frown lines. hahaha. A superficial reason but the main reason is I want to be the way Jesus would be. You may not believe it but Jesus would just smile and take the rudeness, he would let it roll off his back and be kind to them anyway. I want to be like him, I want to be like my co-worker and I can be, I just have to be willing to change.

This trial won't be easy and I know it will take time, but once I get through it, I will be that much stronger. I will be that much more pure and closer to be the most valuable goal. But most of all I will be a much better person in this world, a world that needs good people, at least more of them. SO I encourage you, if you know ways you need to change, you can! there is hope!! That's the best part! You can change if you want, you don't have to stay that way, that's what excites me the most. I am going to change and I can't wait to embrace it!

Be Blessed Dearest Readers!